This flashback just came so suddenly and i decided to just type it out to vent some frustration...it is not some horror stories though but it affects my teenage life...for at least that very month.

When my grandfather, 91, pass away, i attended the wake. He died of lung cancer... the very last stage. Some people ask me how i feel when my grandfather pass away. I still remember saying i was happy- for he get to escape from all the sufferings that the illness had brought onto him. I feel sad too even although my grandfather only know dialect, thus i could not communicate well with him, but he still show me love and care. (Will tell your more about him at my next post as i had side-track a bit).

My father thus invite his friends to my grandfather wake. When he introduced my sibling and i to his friends... he said:

" This is my eldest daughter and my second son"

But when it comes to me,...

"This is the extra"

I remember clearly that i was very shock... how should i respond? Is he my dad? Is this a joke? it is all this thoughts that runs through my mind...

What i done is just a weak smile and take it as a joke, i do not want to act as a rebellious kid and neither do i want to embarressed him...and even till now it is still vividly in my mind.

The wake, the smile, the not-at-all funny joke and the word "EXTRA"

P.S: My sister is 1 year older than my bro, but my bro is 5 years older than me)

i will never let you fall...
...i'll stand up for you forever